I watch him move and things are changing, I can tell. Though his voice hasn’t lowered and the odors mercifully haven’t begun, the mood swings come and go. He is almost a teenager and I feel a mixture of sadness and excitement. He is, after all, my baby. My first born son. I feel sad because my baby is growing up; excited because I am curious to see the young man he will become.
For now, he is still shorter than me (if only by a few inches), and freely gives hugs and kisses. He has that moody disposition of a tween and experiments with being sarcastic, just plain obstinate and saying no.
But on days like these, when the pressures of school (on him) and work (me), are off, we can chill. We talk about books and random things. He asks me to film him do a dog training video. So we step outside into the cold windy day and I try not to tell him what to do …it was his idea…his iPhone. He launches into his spiel… and I bite my tongue so as not to give suggestions…I just keep recording. The dog obeys and gets his treat. Then he looks at me… what do I do mom? And I am thrilled. He’s asking ME what to do…
It is sweet. It tugs at my heart strings. My baby still needs me.
We go inside and I ask if he’d like to bake cupcakes with me. It is something we share… a love for baked goods! He says yes without hesitation and before too long he is licking the bowl… just like he did when he was little.